Wednesday, July 30, 2008


My roomie was doing her namaaz a little while ago,on the occasion of “jagne ki raat”. It can be best described as an equivalent of Shivratri. We 3 kiddos,were looking at her in awe…trying to understand what she was doing. We quite didn’t understand if settling the dupatta over her forehead was a part of her prayer. So we started following the prayer closely again and then figured out that hair should be covered entirely and that is why she was stuffing every strand that came out every now and then.

I feel ignorant and elated at the same time.

Ignorance of that religion.
Elation of tolerance.
And then, there are dreams. I see another dream when I am already living a beautiful one. I made the dream come true. Now, I feel its time to break this and make another. Sometime later, one more would come up to break this one. And I get restless. Indecisive. Judgemental. Irrespectably critical. Oh!! I wish there was a pause!!

The last question I would want my brain to ask is…

”Have I lost the spark??”


Saturday, July 26, 2008


Left to liberal interpretation..

Monday, July 14, 2008


Sometimes its just the gravity…gravity of thought,gravity of memory,gravity of company..
But then…what about time??? Was it not supposed to “heal” everything?? Time or change?? which one actually heals?? Does anything ever gets healed?? Or am I under an illusion?? What makes me call it an illusion?? Time or change??
There is a distant tree…moving away from the train…with trunk so short that it almost makes me feel as if the burden of leaves is sinking it…as if the whole wind has been captured by these leaves…as if that pressure would blow out everything around,given a chance!! Ah!! There you are…chance!!
Luck or chance??? What comes first??
There are kids…kids of every kind. I was a kid. I still am. I still remember trying to figure out,when I was four, why the tracks and trees were moving away while I was on the train. I have learnt. Little late, though. Learning late and learning the harder way…bachpan ki bhimari..shaayad!!
Glad that the TTE has asked for the identity proof for the first time in the past 7 months of my hyd-chennai shuttle! No. Its not,entirely, the system that is making me happy. It’s the happiness of a part of my brain which has been acknowledged for remembering that 17 digit license number, for not making me run around whenever I needed it and, most of all, for reinforcing my confidence of being a “birthday/phone number bank” .
Just recollected this line…
“The beauty about reminder service is that we never know when it works.”
Now that gives me an idea or two…how about charging these forgetful dumbos with ten bucks everytime they are reminded of bdays?? And say about 100 bucks when it has really saved?? I mean, when it actually worked. Or may be, I wont charge them with anything. They would just have to laugh for every joke of mine,genuinely. No. laughing “at” my jokes is prohibited. Even now!!
I still wave at those kids who wave with an innocent madness whenever a train passes by!! Good old “Night at the hotel”…taught me a thing. I wonder why our English textbooks have never been revised!?My teacher is still using that precious notes of mine to dictate to the class. I was about to ask her if I can have the pleasure of making a print of it when she said one of the most memorable and beautiful things to me…”Your handwriting….and the old cover…reminds me of you each day child!!I never allow the kids to touch it…nor do I leave it in the cupboard. I get it home.”
First..I felt happy. Needless to say.
Second…how could I miss out on such a simple thing??? She could have as well got it xeroxed!!! Stupid ha!! Yeah!! I am..most of the time!!
Have to mention this. I write better when I am travelling. The other day…on my way back to chennai..( almost happens every other weekend)….i had many lines popping in my head. Of what use? I didn’t even have a pen/pencil and paper. Leave alone the lappy. I had to be punished with that feeling of not being able to pen down those lines for my eleventh hour plan of running from the office to the station with just the wallet and mobile duo!! I had to stare out of the window. No kids to entertain either. But that span of 4 hours in the evening reinforced the fact that “cricket is a religion in India”. There were open places which were only a fourth of the size of a stadium which had atleast 6 matches going on at a time. Mass prayer, I guess!! And then there was a batsman,bowler and keeper trio who had the luxury of having all the ground for themselves! These are just the players of two villages…I have crossed atleast 8 such villages!!
And then, there are dreams. No. Not the ones which keep us on the run in life. The ones that linger…the ones that pop questions…and the ones that scare our sub-conscious to the point of conscious denial.
In aankhon ki masti ke
Masthanein hazaaron hain

What a beautiful way to spend the evenings...
Four gals…four different worlds…within the four walls…
And the song goes…

Hum labon se keh na paaye…unse haal-e-dil kabhi
Aur woh samjhe nahin yeh…
Kya cheez hain

I am not sure which one I love better. Khamoshi itself?Or the pause that comes before it is sung? Or the way Jagjit sings it!?
Read somewhere..
“I love work. It gives me something to do between the weekends.”

Monday, July 07, 2008

Yawn!!!!!!!! :o

I want to shout Vooohooooooooo!! N say i hav got internet at my place...
but lets try this..i yawn...n u say vooohoooooooo!! obviously!!after all, pleasure is yours! =P

off to sleeeeppp....zzzzzzz!! more thing..this post is the testimony to the fact tat i am still concerned about u,my darling blog!!